I’ll admit, I get discouraged sometimes, but I wait. Sometimes I wonder if waiting is really what I should be doing, but I wait. People tell me that I should just get married- that it’s the right thing to do, but I wait. People tell me my high standards will keep me single for a long time, but I wait. And that’s what I tell them: “I’ll wait.” Because it’s my life, and I’m quite happy with it the way it is right now. I’ll wait because if I wanted to settle for less than God’s perfect plan, I would have been married a long time ago. I’ll wait because God knows what He is doing. I’ll wait because I know that my worst and loneliest day as a single person is better than my best day married to the wrong man. I’ll wait because settling is not an option. I’ll wait because I deserve to wait- I deserve to not settle. I’ll wait because I’m not incomplete or unfulfilled or serving some sort of punishment for my lack of obedience or perfection in God’s eyes.
People say if you’re “waiting,” you’re just being too picky. It sure seems easy for married people to say this to single people. To them I say, I understand it’s not about finding a perfect person. If that were the case, I’d be single forever- not because I wouldn’t be able to find a perfect person but because I’m NOT a perfect person. I’m flawed, and I hope I don’t find someone who is perfect because they would never be able to put up with me.
I know it’s not about perfection. That’s not what I’m waiting for. I’ll wait for a man that wants to do right in the sight of God. I’ll wait for a man who I trust with my heart and my life. I’ll wait for a man I am proud to stand by. I’ll wait for a man I would go to the ends of the earth with if he felt it were God’s will. I’ll wait for a man who makes me happy not because of anything he could give me or do for me, but simply because of who he is. I’ll wait for a man who can accept my utter imperfection and will love me anyway as I will love him in spite of his. I’ll wait for a man that loves Jesus, that I can look up to, and that I can wake up to for the rest of my life. Anyone who is in love will tell you it exists. It is just not too much to ask for, and I will wait for it.
I want to share with you a conversation I had with a older gentleman in my church tonight. He asked me, as he often does, if I had a boyfriend yet. I told him I didn’t, and he told me something tonight that I needed to hear. I even had to bite my lip while he was speaking to keep from bursting into tears. He told me:
“I can’t imagine living 50 years without my wife. If I hadn’t found her or married someone else… it’s just unfathomable to me. You are a priceless gem, and you are doing the right thing. Being single is far better than being in a relationship with the wrong person. You remember this.. That every time you go home from a lousy date, and come home and say ‘He’s not the one. I’ll wait for the person God has for me,” I applaud you. I stand and applaud you because I know that you are going to find someone amazing. In God’s time, he will come.”
I want to encourage you tonight, if you’re waiting on God, you’re doing the right thing. God works in the most miraculous and wonderful ways. And as long as you are doing his will and walking in obedience, he will take care of you. You are not being too picky. You’re not “waiting on perfection.” You’re not superior or entitled. You’re not unworthy, unlovable, too imperfect, disobedient…. or any other thing that this world may tell you that you are. No one gets to write your story but you and God. No one else gets a say in your timeline but its Author. No one gets to tell you not to wait because you have chosen to do right and to wait for a life partner to do right with… And I applaud you.