Have you ever felt unworthy?
Have you ever felt not good enough?
Have you ever been dissatisfied with yourself?
I think we all have at one point or another. I think that every human being from Adam and Eve on down through you and I have been dissatisfied with ourselves, and while we are busy slapping band-aids on our feelings, maybe God had a different plan in store…
“You are amazing just the way you are.” That is what we want to hear when everything inside us tells us we are missing the mark. “Be satisfied with who God made you to be.” We long for people to applaud our efforts, and tell us how wonderful we are because something inside of us constantly longs to be more.
Could God have placed this dissatisfaction inside of us for a reason? I believe Paul knew he wasn’t enough when he admitted,
Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus.Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Phillippians 3:12-14
I believe David knew he was not enough when he said,
I said to the Lord, “You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing.” Psalms 16:2
There are countless Psalms of David asking God for help, David repenting, David begging God to lead him, David chasing after God. There never was a time when David says, “Lord, you made me perfect just the way I am.” Hmm. No, David constantly says, “Lord, I need you…”
So why do we mask our own imperfections, while constantly feeling the need for approval and admiration? I honestly believe we are missing the point. The point being we are supposed to be dissatisfied with ourselves, our Christian lives, our sin, our imperfections. Why? Not to focus on them, and get depressed, and lay around and eat ice cream. No, this dissatisfaction is supposed to motivate us to get up off the couch, and chase after God– to be men and women after God’s own heart.
David did not sit down and think, “I am a man after God’s heart. I can stop chasing Him now. I can stop needing Him now. I am perfect and wonderful and just need to be loved and accepted.” David was in constant pursuit of God. A man chasing after the heart of God.
Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. Phillippians 4:11-13
Let me say this. Dissatisfaction and discontentment are not the same thing. We are to live in peace and contentment at where God has placed us, the life He has given us, and in who HE is to us. We are to be content in Jesus Christ alone, even satisfied in who He is and all He has done and will do. He is good and righteous and just and perfect in all his ways. However, we are not. It is so so vitally important to our Christian walk to realize this.
Paul says this, “Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates?” 2 Corinthians 13:5
Take a good long look in the mirror of God’s word every day, and LOOK for imperfections. LOOK for places that need improving. Test yourself. Be dissatisfied with what you see, and ask God to help you improve it. That’s the only way we are going to even finish our race strong, let alone win it.
We hear all the time, “How will the world know they are lost if we do not tell them they are? If we do not tell them of their sin?” Well, how will Christians grow if we do not tell them they need to be growing and changing?
If we constantly tell one another we are good, and perfect the way we are, how can we then push each other toward Christ? Why would we want to change to be better if we are all okay? Thank God I am not satisfied with my current spiritual condition, and you shouldn’t be either. We all have areas in our lives that need work and God’s help to change. We all need our hearts to be transformed every day to the image of Jesus Christ.
Being fully and completely content and satisfied in Christ, and wholly dissatisfied in and with ourselves leads us toward Him in every circumstance.
The answer is….. you are not good enough, I am not good enough. Embrace it for the journey. We need Christ. We need to strive toward Him in obedience, in reading His word, in following in His footsteps, in striving toward the mark every day. Let’s not stop running til the race is done. Keep moving! Let your dissatisfaction, not hold you back, but motivate you every day towards more of the one in whom you are completely satisfied.