I know I talk about modesty a lot. I do that because I want girls to see their worth is in their hearts instead of in their bodies. They don’t have to catch a man showing off parts of their bodies that are for their husbands eyes only. This is not because your body is bad or those parts of your body are bad. They aren’t at all. They are beautiful and sacred and special and when they are covered, it keeps them that way. The most precious of jewels aren’t for everyday wear. They aren’t even for everyone. Only the one who pays the highest price gets to own them, and even then, they are taken care of and prized and set apart. This is what your body is. It is only meant for your husband to see and treasure….
However, I never want my message to be confused with saying that we need to keep our bodies covered because men can not control themselves. They most certainly can. In this crazy sex-obsessed world, there are actually men who keep their minds clean and pure. [everyone put on your shocked faces] In all reality, God says it can be done, and it can.
To say or think or promote the idea that men can not control themselves is insulting and demeaning and destructive.
First, it is insulting to men. I am not a man, but I bet if someone was constantly saying that I, as a respectable human being, had animalistic tendencies and urges that just could not be fought, I would be slightly offended every now and then. Men are strong and brave and capable. Believe that, and stop letting the world make our men into children- or worse, animals.
Secondly, it is insulting to God. This applies to every area. Not just in the area of modesty. When God made man and woman, he actually set MAN up to be the head of the household. What in the world was He thinking? He obviously doesn’t understand that men can’t even control their own urges let alone control a home, a church, or community. Umm, I think God knew what He was doing. He actually gave us an entire book of great examples of what a strong man could be when yielded completely to Him. He gave us Moses and Joshua and King David and the Apostle Paul… And so many other strong brave [yet imperfect] men. Have we forgotten that all men can live up to what God expects of them? God didn’t. He believes in them…. and He knows what He is doing.
Lastly, it is destructive. When we have this attitude of “men can’t control themselves so we have to dress modestly and treat them like children and constantly beat them over the head with what they are supplied to be doing or what they are doing wrong,” well, we destroy everything God has made them to be. Of course, they are going to sit back and think… “Well I can’t control myself anyway. I am just like an animal. It’s their fault for not protecting me or dressing that way or not reminding me enough how to be a man. I might as well…..” Come on.
We need a generation of men. So how are we going to see this happen? We need to remind them of who they were meant to be. Men of honor, and courage, and purity, and bravery, and strength, and love. We need to see in them everything we believe GREAT men to be.
You want a big, strong, great man? Build them up. Tearing them down will only get you a small, weak, destroyed man.
I’m not saying throw off all your responsibility because they can handle it from here. I’m saying… Let’s turn it around. Trust the men in your life with being who they were called to be. Do YOUR part to build them up and encourage them. Draw out the greatness with words of encouragement and affirmation. Stop expecting so little of such great men. They can do it. Believe in them… expect and allow them to be MEN.