Is this real life??

Who remembers the very first AOL? I do. I remember the “buddy list” where you had all your friends and could chat with them online via instant message. It was the coolest thing!

These days, social media is HUGE part of our lives. Most people log on every single day to check out what their friends are saying and doing. It is a great way to catch up with old friends, keep up with current friends, and make new ones.

However, there are so many young people who obsessed with their online lives. Looking through pictures from their friends, comparing their looks and comparing their lives. We have girls posting pictures of themselves every day needing likes to boost their self esteem. Every detail is broadcasted for the world to know and approve and give attention for. Insecurities are compounded and jealousy is rampant. We crave the attention and live for the approval of others.

Although helpful, I feel that the world would be much better off sometimes if it were not for social media. So many are more concerned with what their lives look like on social media than what they actually are.

So what can we do about it?

We have to admit the problem. Cliche, I know, but we have to recognize the mistakes in our thinking before we can begin to fix them. How do you feel about your social media profile? Could you be happy with your life if it were deleted…. or would you feel alone without any attention to boost your self-esteem? Do you live your life to live it or for how it looks on Facebook?

Be honest with yourself.

Secondly, recognize where you are in life. Jim Elliot, the martyr missionary, said,  “Wherever you are, be all there.” If we are so much more concerned with how our lives LOOK than how they FEEL, we will miss our entire lives. In 10 years, or even 5 years, or probably even 1 year, it is really not going to matter how many “likes” your profile picture got or how many people were impressed with your #nofilter selfies on instagram or your check in at the grocery store, starbucks, forever 21, and Panera bread.

I’m not saying any of those things are inherently wrong. [As long as we are keeping it classy] But, what I’m saying is what do we take from these things? Our self-worth? Really? There are so many better things we can be using social media for rather than getting attention from people for our own selfish gain.

It all boils down to WHY we do what we do. What if it were all shut down? What of our REAL lives would we have left? Have we poured so much of ourselves into our online profile that real life is suffering? Because that’s what matters most: the people in real life that we have relationships with; the ministries we can be giving our time and energy to; the real life issues that we can address when we aren’t so concerned with ourselves and how we look online.

The only cure is to define ourselves completely with CHRIST.

So easily we buy into the lie that the world has something “on us” and that we need to measure up to the standard it has set for us. We try to put a band-aid over the issues by telling ourselves and each other, “You are beautiful.. and unique.. and wonderful.. and special all on your own.” But without God, those good feelings will fade. Your worth does not come from how many friends you have or how many “likes” your Facebook status gets, how many followers you have on twitter, or how many double-taps you get on instagram.

Your worth comes from the One who created you, and has already defined you.

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. Proverbs 31:10

The Proverbs 31 woman remembers the price that was paid for her- a price far above the most costly vanities of earth. Jesus Christ bought and paid for her with His precious blood. He did not pay this price only for her salvation. He bought her very soul. She belongs to God, and through this transaction, she is enabled to live a valiant, virtuous life through the strength of Jesus. When she is completely abandoned to her Savior, she can showcase not her own, but HIS strength, and beauty, and grace.

Jesus Christ is so beautiful, and when we find our identity in Him alone, we are defined with HIS beauty. Is there anything more beautiful than Jesus? Nope… I promise. Get to know Him, and you will know what I mean.

To be honest, I’m over it. I’m over this exhausted girl who puts pitiful statuses up about her depressing view on life. I’m over the duck faces and pouty lips and bikini shots. I’m over the girl that looks so tired and hungry. I like confident girls. I like people filled with life! I’m over this hollow-eyed, empty, party garbage all over the internet.

I get worried for young girls because I want them to feel that they can be smart and sassy and weird and geeky and independent and beautiful and lovely and godly and fun and fulfilled… and not so withered and shriveled and empty and depressing.

Let’s re-evaluate our social activity and what we are most concerned with. Social media is not evil, but when we are more concerned with what we look like than who we are, our real lives and ministries and relationships suffer.

So we can waste our lives begging for attention on social media or……We can make a change in social media. Let’s start a rebellion!! Let’s use our social media for good and to glorify God instead of ourselves. Let’s be different, set-apart. Let’s be the girls God not only wants us to be, but calls us to be. Let’s not waste our uniqueness competing and emulating everyone else. Let’s be a voice for good and for God.

It’s really our choice to make. We need to wake up, girls. This is real life.

Hashtag #thefulltimegirlREBELLION to join the movement!!!


  1. You know what? Yesterday I was scrolling through some of my old posts on Facebook and I saw one from early 2012 where I said, “There’s no greater force to be reckoned with than a woman with FAITH! God is raising up a generation of Jesus-crazy girls to do His work!” I was once again reminded of my purpose and my mission in life, and then I read this blog post. So on point and so in line with what God was saying. Thanks so much for this, I’m so grateful to be a part of His perfect plan for His glory. #thefulltimegirlREBELLION


  2. Wow. This is exactly what I have been thinking about the past few weeks especially when I find myself surrounded by friends who are too busy playing with their phones, checking their instagram and facebook profiles rather than interacting with the people right in front of them.

    It’s so easy to get pulled into the world of social media that you end up missing out on real life and the people that are in it as well as turn to it as a source of boosting your self-esteem and finding your identity in your online profile ratings rather than in Jesus.

    Thank you so much for this. Be blessed!


  3. Thanks for writing this Lauren! I know you are mostly referring to teen girls in this article – but I must tell you that being a 40+ woman – I think there are almost as many, if not more, 40+ women that struggle with the same issues!

    Social media definitely has contributed to the competition between women – whether it is how they are raising their children, how great a wife and mother they are, how great a cook and home decorator they are, how beautiful their hair, makeup, nails, clothes, jewelry, etc. are. They compare vacations, jobs, how much money they are making – you name it! Everything is a competition!

    Social media has just become a method to brag (or what appears to be bragging) and all that it does is make others feel bad about their own life – or think they need to step it up because they aren’t doing enough in these areas.

    I just found your blog today and love it! You say everything I am thinking!

    Keep up the great work and speaking the truth because although I have a teen daughter – all you say applies to us “Moms” too!



    • Thanks so much Jen! That’s so good to hear. We girls have got to stuck together to encourage each other and help one another remember the important things. :] God bless!!


  4. yes yes yes. I wish my sisters would read this. it is so easy to get wrapped up in the world of social media and start depending on the approval of others. i think that social media also inhibits women from being who they truly are (being “real”) because they are afraid of rejection. everyone just wants to “fit in” and be status quo. but as women of the Lord, we should be fearless and free to express ourselves despite what everyone else thinks. God is countercultural. keep spreading the word girlfriend !


  5. This is so good! And so true! I can’t stand how so many girls use social media to get attention. I also can’t stand how they are so consumed with their social networking life that they don’t care about their REAL life. Social networking can become so fake. Thanks for this post!


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